On Friday night, my boyfriend and I sat on the couch for a refreshing evening of doing nothing together. We tuned into a baseball game, he picked up my guitar, and I eagerly booted up “Pokémon Pokopia,” the 30-year-old franchise’s new cozy life simulator game, which is unlike anything we’ve seen from Pokémon before.
I narrated my experience as I played, explaining the process of constructing habitats to increase the comfort levels of my Pokémon friends, a primary objective of the game.
“Onix is stuck in a cave, but I can’t break through the walls, so Squirtle suggested throwing a party to make it rain to soften the rocks,” I told my boyfriend as I played. “But Squirtle and I don’t know what ‘celebration’ means, so we have to ask Professor Tangrowth what it means to ‘party.’”
I rejoiced when I finally made it rain and awakened Kyogre — but then Charmander, who calls me “bestie,” discovered that the rain makes the flame on its tail go out, so I had to build a little hut for shelter with the help of our pals Timburr and Hitmonchan.
Suddenly, it was 11:30 p.m. I only looked up because the baseball game was about to end. To my horror, my boyfriend had fallen asleep on the couch beside me.
I did not realize he was asleep. I was so engrossed in building habitats for my Pokémon pals that I didn’t notice that he had stopped responding to my commentary … since he was no longer awake. While he drifted in and out of a light couch snooze, I had never stopped relaying a detailed play-by-play of how I was restoring a seaside habitat for Magikarp. I was completely oblivious.
I was, and am, embarrassed that this happened. For my own good, I have no choice but to believe that I committed this faux pas not because I am an inattentive partner, but because “Pokopia” is …